I was silent the past month for two main reasons. First, I decided to get a part-time job to feel “normal” and to take a break from all the movie-making stuff to avoid feeling burnt out. I realized, however, that I was hemorrhaging money and momentum by not being fully 100% on the film. After a few weeks, I realized I really needed to up the anty and push the film forward by submitting it to SXSW 2022. It was the most difficult (and expensive) submission process but I figured cutting down on my cannabis purchases (notice I said purchases and not intake) will help me afford it. Luckily, I have buddies that grow and kick down!
Soon after I completed the SXSW application, several personal events happened and I had to sink further under the covers. It was a memorial for my best friend who committed suicide a year ago so I was feeling really bummed. I started getting kind of depressed so I decided to let go of my part-time job and go full-time on my hedge fund activities to finance my next set of activities for the film festival journey. It was tricky because I was somewhat burnt out, the momentum for the film really slowed down, and I’ve also been feeling all roller-coaster because of too many things on my plate. To make things worse, I was receiving numerous rejection letters one after another and it didn’t make me feel any better.
One afternoon, I received the rejection letter from Another Hole In The Head Film Festival at New People Cinema in Japantown. I was really devastated to find out. I had hoped to be validated by their laurels but even with “friends” involved in their committees, the movie, with the 20 years I put into it, was completely ignored. Those “friends” never even tried to promote it. I felt betrayed. It was weird. I know I’m not entitled but “dammit!” I exclaimed. “I show up for people, but they don’t show up for me.” I was starting to be negative. Luckily, I have close friends to remind me that “most people will only support you once you’re successful so just keep going.” And, with that, I decided to get back into the ring.

It’s been several years since we spoke but Michael “Riggs” Rodgers, who played Metatron in the movie, had been missing this whole time. He deleted most of his social media presence and I no longer had his number. I was distraught thinking that he may have already gone to the other side. I looked on Facebook, Instagram, YouTube, Twitter, LinkedIn, I almost went on Tinder just to see if he was on there! He wasn’t and neither am I now. Sorry ladies. But, several weeks ago, I thought of messaging him on Venmo out of all places and sent him .02 cents with a message to call me. IT WORKED!!!!
Since then, I’ve been working out practicing martial arts to calm my nerves and decided to get back to work on the movie. After a bad day in the markets the other day, I decided to take a long bath to calm myself. While chilling in the bath, I got a message from the founder and director of SF IndieFest inviting me to screen the movie at the 24th annual festival at Roxie Cinema in the Mission in February next year!! I WAS SOOOOOOO SURPRISED!!!!
SF IndieFest is the main film festival event with Another Hole In The Head, SF IndieShorts, SF IndieDocs, and Decibels Film Fest as the subsidiary festivals. I was really elated to find out and almost cried. Almost. See, I dreamt about it when I was just a teen. I stood in front of the Roxie and said to the sky, “One day…”
With the official selection of SF IndieFest in February, I’ve started pulling together potential after-party options for the screening and have some mock-ups for AR posters and stickers for bombing the city. I’m also looking to see if I can organize a live performance / DJ party around that time since many folks will be coming into the city for the Roxie Cinema showing.
I’m really excited about the things to come. There’s tons of work to do now so expect a bit more communication from me now that I’m ready to get in the ring again. POW!!